Eulogizing

Well, it's over. Here are some blogs marking the occasion:

• Four Habs Fans: GOODBYE MY LOVERS
• The 2 Man Advantage: "Not only was Laraque very gracious in the handshake line but he gave the cool urban handshake to every Bruin. He is awesome. Add this to my bucket list: get the cool urban handshake huggy thing from BGL before I die. Someone set this up. My birthday is December 10th."
• Mass Hysteria Sports: "Alas, poor Montreal. I knew them well,/For long have they our fear'd oppressors stood,/And yet, today, their mournful deathly knell/Tolls out. And thusly, eulogize we should."
• LoweTide: "I dreamed of a 4-game sweep in the playoffs. It never came in my childhood and barely came in my adult life. But it's here and it's beautiful. So, in my own way I'd like to remember Bobby Orr tonight. He was a man touched by God, and the Bruins have done something that was impossible in his own time: beat the Habs in 4."
• Pension Plan Puppets: "Hey! Look at that! It's exactly how many games the Habs won in the playoffs. Coincidentally, it's the number of Stanley Cups they have won since 1993."
• Puck Daddy: thought Montreal was going to win the cup, will have a eulogy soon.
  
• Hockey Blog Adventure: "For the whiners: Kessel was totally offsides and it was awesome."
• And one last thing...
  

It's been fun, those of you who have read. An inside source at cycle like the sedins has reported that I may be back for the next round....just like the bruins.

GOOD NIGHT

4-2
5-1
4-2
4-1
Good night, Montreal.

Blitzkrieg Bob (caution: some swears)

This comes from super-commenter-and-songwriter "Moeman" over at FourHabsFans - possibly one of the best sources of intelligent commentary on the habs, as well as having hot chicks on all of their gameday previews.

(this is totally not to make up for my homerism from earlier I swear)

To the tune of the Ramones' "Blitzkrieg Bop." If you don't know it, youtube it.

Habs ho, lets go!
Habs ho, lets go!
Habs ho, lets go!
Habs ho, lets go!

Habs losing in a straight line
Habs going through a tight bind
The media are losing their fucking minds
They blitzkrieg Bob

They're piling on at RDS
110% generates steamed shit
Pulsating to LaPresse twits
They blitzkrieg Bob

Hey ho, lets go shootem in the back now
What they want, je ne sais quoi
They're all reved up and full of bile

Habs losing in a straight line
Habs going through a tight bind
The media are losing their fucking minds
They blitzkrieg Bob

They're piling on at CBC
TSN generates monkey shit
Pulsating to that maguire twit
They blitzkrieg Bob

Hey ho, lets go shootem in the back now
What they want, je ne sais quoi
They're all reved up and full of bile

Habs losing in a straight line
Habs going through a tight bind
The media are losing their fucking minds
They blitzkrieg Bob

They're piling on at RDI
Kypreos generates lunkhead shit
Pulsating to that PJ twit
They blitzkrieg Bob

Habs ho, lets go!
Habs ho, lets go!
Habs ho, lets go!
Habs ho, lets go!

Party like it's 1992

Yup, totally misquoted Stanley Cup of Chowder in the last post. I'd correct it, but I can live with my mistakes and am trying to focus on the game at hand. That said, I will say that everyone should go check out this fantastic post over at Barry Melrose Rocks about game 3.

Oh, and here are your previews:

BRUINS

• Stanley Cup of Chowder: I'm not going to quote it because I'll just get it wrong again. Go read it and participate in the Public Skate! (Whatup Evan)
  
• Hockey Blog Adventure: Playing with fire.
  
• Hub Hockey: Nice vid.
• Matt Kalman: "Montreal center Tomas Plekanec has only skated in two of the three games, but he’s still a minus-4."
• BIG BAD BRUINS!: Get psyched with some videos. Seriously. GO GO BLACK AND GOLD
  

HABS

• Four Habs Fans: "You can go ahead and blame injuries, blame reffing, blame Bob, blame Carey, blame Rollie Melanson, blame Benoit Brunet - look, there's a lot of blame to go around here."
• Habs Inside/Out: "The mood was quiet, more than defiant, on Tuesday as the Canadiens prepared for what could be their final game of the 2009 playoffs."
• Montreal Gazette: "The wonderfully talented, splendidly coached Boston Bruins just one victory from dusting the Habs and ending their 100th season, also known as the world’s longest funeral." Wow, the Gazette kinda hates the hometown team, huh?
  
• Still don't know any other habs blogs. FHF is my favorite, though.
  

Your Bruins-lovin' guest blogger trying not to get too homerific,
Cornelius.

It's Blogoggedeon Time: Game 3 Previews

Here's every bruins and Habs blog I read regularly that has a preview up for tonight's game. It's a lot of reading. Not all of it matters.

BRUINS:

• Hockey Blog Adventure: Jack Edwards-esque homerism leads me to put mine on top. GET PSYCHED!
  
• Stanley Cup of Chowder: "Montreal has yet to find an answer to thwart the B's tremendous depth. Phil Kessel, David Krejci, and Milan Lucic combined for seven points in game one to burn the Habs. Game 2? The trio got just one assist, from Kessel, and the Bruins still put up a 5-spot."
• Cameron Frye: "I'm starting to rethink my B's in six prediction - but oh well, so they win in five. I really don't think any of us will be that broken hearted if they swept or pulled it out in five."
  
• HubHockey: Usually has something. Didn't by publish time.
  
• Jesse Connolly: "Montreal has yet to find an answer to thwart the B's tremendous depth. Phil Kessel, David Krejci, and Milan Lucic combined for seven points in game one to burn the Habs. Game 2? The trio got just one assist, from Kessel, and the Bruins still put up a 5-spot."
  

HABS:

• Four Habs Fans: "Over / under on the sound of the first booing from Habs fans? I've got 7:24"
• Habs Inside/Out: "With or without Lucic, the Bruins have been the superior team for most of the games and they have been much more disciplined than the Canadiens."
• Ok, I don't really know the Habs blogs that well. Leave good ones I missed in the comments.

Trip Report: Games 1 and 2

Howdy, folks! Cornelius here. I'm a Bruins fan and you can read my usual rambling over at my site, the Hockey Blog Adventure.

I went to games one and two of the series and took some crappy cell phone pictures, so I'd like to share them with y'all to give you a feel for what it's like at the games.

GAME 1
Got there early. Gotta watch some warmups.Watch them from the away zone. It's better for taunting. When you're up in the balcony (like I was) they can't hear you.
This was an awesome hat. Just awesome:Pretty solid mustache on that guy, too. He wanted me to wear it, but I am superstitious.

Speaking of solid accessories...Somebody call Puck Daddy. We've got a code 6 jersey foul in the building. Check this out:Pats sleeve, Garnett middle, Sox sleeve, and what's that? Is that a bruins two?Nope, it's a 42! Way to cut up your Wheeler or Stock jersey there, buddy.

And that's all I took for game one.
GAME 2
Got there even earlier. If you take the right route to your seats, you can go past the away dressing room. I've seen the flyers kick a soccerball around in there before. They won that game. The Habs are doing the same thing.I don't know which ones, since I don't recognize them. Everyone's got porn staches like crazy, though.

Got to warmups early again. This time, we were better prepared. Made a sign or two, and really got some chants going. When the home fans are chanting your name during warmups, it's going to be a rough night. Here's an awesome sign someone made:Solid. Like me, that person was up in the balcony for the game, but on the glass for warmups.

Before the game, the Bruins unfurled a GIANT flag with a Bruins logo on it along a section. I think they meant it to stay on the section, but fans had other ideas. That flag moved around the whole lower bowl. So awesome.It kept going around. As Jack Edwards said, "Boston is a Hockey town again."

Superduper security going on in the game, too. Saturday night, late start, more habs fans...recipe for disaster. This guy hung out in our section the whole night.He did not look like the kind of guy to be messing around.

Here are the signs we had for warmups.Taken at the end of the second. I'm going to have to make some JAAAAAAA ROOOOOOOO signs if it goes to five.

Another awesome sign:I asked the guy if that meant Komisarek was a Chicken or a Cock. (Not pictured: Sign showing the CH logo as a toilet seat. I can't unsee it. It is glorious, or is that glorieux?)

Lastly, it wouldn't be Montreal without strippers.Thanks for coming, don't forget to tip your waitress!

All in all it was a great couple of evenings.
Also, this happened:

You can read my recap of Game 2 here.

Redefining the term 'meathead'

Funny stuff from Cornelius Hardenberg. Check it out.

If this series were a hockey player

... it would be Ornery Richard. Get it?

Sorry had to get that pun out of my system.

Five Questions: Four Habs Fans (Canadiens)

(Four Habs Fans is one of the funniest team blogs in the hockey blogosphere. They've been steady and remarkably to-the-point contributors, which makes us like them even more. The pictures of gorgeous barely clothed women provide that extra layer of blogger gravy. Make sure to check them out)

1. What will the Canadiens need to do to beat the Bruins?
An act of God, either Jesus Price coming up BIG or the miraculous healing of Andrei Markov

2. What would need to happen for the Bruins to win?
The sun to come up

3. Fan Favorite
Jaro (Jaroslav Halak). A backup goalie who speaks in an incomprehensible English frequently skewered on FHF, "Ja-ro!" is chanted like no other as soon as Carey lets in a bad one.

4. Your team's Goat-to-Be
Alex Kovalev. After an up and down season, a Playoff flameout will lead to calls for not resigning the UFA over the summer.

5. Top storyline
It's Habs-Bruins. The history and rivalry requires no storyline.

Five Questions: Stanley Cup of Chowder (Bruins)

(Evan from Stanley Cup of Chowder has been an absolute beast all year long. He's one of the first ever contributors to CLS and one of our favorite Boston Bruins bloggers. And there's a LOT of good Bruins bloggers. Bookmarking SCoC is a must, brobots.)

What will the Bruins need to do to beat the Canadiens?

Test Carey Price early and often
Price has been very streaky this year. The Bruins need to challenge him and rattle his confidence early in this series.

Bring their hardhats
The Canadiens don’t like to play the physical brand of hockey that the Bruins play. I think this series is going to go the distance. It is important to wear a team down physically in a long series.

Keep their composure
The Habs have some players that like to agitate and get under your skin. The Bruins can’t lose their cool and take dumb retaliatory penalties.

Win the first 2 at home
The Bell Centre in April is not an easy place to play. If the Bruins can win 2 at home to put the Habs back on their heals heading to Montreal, they will be in good shape.

Plan B
If all else fails, they can always resort to these options:
- Bribe a TSA official to plant drugs, weapons, and prohibited livestock in the Habs’ luggage before they go through customs.
- Have Michael Ryder show them some of Boston’s local waterholes. Ryan O’Byrne’s turtling prowess might come in handy if they stop by The Penalty Box or Sullivan’s Tap.
- Hire some kid with no future to chant “Ole, Ole, Ole” repeatedly outside their hotel in the middle of the night.
- Have Boston PD devise a sting operation to bait members of the Canadiens with unattended handbags.

What will need to happen for the Canadiens to win?

In order for the Canadiens to win this series they will need to find a time machine and bring back Patrick Roy and Rocket Richard in their prime. You don’t win playoff series by cowering in fear.

In all seriousness, I think the Bruins will win the series in 7 games. Whenever these two teams meet in the playoffs, you can throw the standings out the windows. It will not be the cake walk that some B’s fans are predicting.

Fan Favorites

Milan Lucic
Looch’s wrecking ball style of play certainly endears him to the balcony dwellers at The Garden.

Tim Thomas
Some B’s fans have referred to Tim Thomas as a folk hero for his unexpected rise from minor league nomad to Vezina candidate. I think Timmy’s stock in The Hub has risen even further after the way he went after Sean Avery last Saturday. If Thomas can beat the Habs in a playoff series, he will never have to pay for a drink in this town again.

Aaron Ward
Wardo has become a fan favorite largely due to his witty and insightful weekly interviews on Toucher & Rich, a popular morning drive radio show on WBCN in Boston.

The Bruins' Goat-to-Be

Bashing Manny Fernandez has become Boston’s new favorite pastime. It seems like years ago that I wrote “The New England Hockey scene hasn’t seen a goaltending tandem like this since Bob and Walt Tenor” in my Cycle Like the Sedins Hockey Orphan post. Chances are that Manny will not see any ice time in this series unless god forbid Thomas gets hurt (knock on wood). If Fernandez does play, he could easily be the goat.

This is Boston, so anyone is eligible to be the goat. The slightest miscue could label you as a goat for the rest of your life. Just ask Bill Buckner or Glen Wesley.

Top Storyline
Boston-Montreal is storyline enough, but there are plenty of secondary storylines in this one:
- Plenty of bad blood carried over from last game
- Bruins have dominated the Canadiens this year
- Rematch of last year’s exciting 7 game opening round series
- Michael Ryder playing against his former team
- Claude Julien coaching against the man that fired him
- Lots of playoff history between the 2 teams
- Habs trying to salvage a disappointing season during their 100 year celebration
- The long history of the Habs’ success vs. the B’s in the playoffs
- The Cities are separated by about 300 miles and the Habs fans travel well